WHY DO I WRITE?

Depending on what day you ask me this question, I might say I write to give life to the characters in my head, or I might answer, “the heck if I know.”

The other day I had one of those “heck if I know” and “why do I do this to myself?” moments. I got my second rejection from “Woman’s World” magazine. That’s two for two. Later that day I got my first ever rejection (sort of) from the True Romance editor. She said while my latest submitted story was great and enjoyable, they were no longer taking summer stories and could I please resubmit next spring. I’d submitted it as a September story, but since it takes place end of August-Labor Day weekend, I can see how the editors would see it as a summer story. I’ll resubmit next April. Although I’ve had success with the Trues and I love writing for them I was a little disappointed that I’d have to possibly wait a year to see this story in print. As for WW, they are a notoriously hard nut to crack, but I’m determined. It doesn’t take long to write an 800-word story so I’ll keep writing and submitting to them.

What inspired this blog was an article I wrote in 1997 titled, “Why I Write” for my now-defunct local RWA chapter. Here’s some of what I wrote then (in bold):

If you believe the doomsayers at RWA, a new writer’s chance for publication is slim to none. So why do I persist against overwhelming odds? Why do I give up reading, TV, socializing to stare at a blank computer screen? (Why indeed, I’ve asked myself many times since I wrote this. I still refuse to listen to the naysayers).

I write because I love to write. My heart soars when I’m transported to the Wyoming plains with Alec and Sabrina, or standing in Tom’s gleaming white kitchen with him and Mary Beth. I dream of sharing Alec and Sabrina, Tom and Mary Beth, with others. (I still haven’t shared Alec and Sabrina. That story went nowhere, but it was set on a ranch in Wyoming. I’m strictly an East Coast girl. However, Tom and Mary Beth were characters in my first pubbed novel with Avalon. And that novel was set in my hometown in Delaware-so write what you know. I learned that lesson).

Here’s more of what I wrote in 1997:

I want readers to love Alec for his beauty and his fierce devotion to his family. I want them to cheer Sabrina’s spunk and her determination to have what she wants from life. I want them to laugh and cry when Tom and Mary Beth take tentative steps to rekindle the love they once denied. (In 1997 I’d only completed two novels. I’ve completed a few more since then (some pubbed, some not), and I’ve loved all my heroes: Tom, Logan, Adam, Dominic, Nick, Matteo and also the heroes in my short stories, but Alec was and is my first love. A tall proud Cherokee, just thinking about him makes my pulse jump. I’ve got to use him and Sabrina in another book).

So why am I still writing? I’ve had limited success. Thank God for the epubs and magazines. In addition to my Avalon book, I’ve got two romantic suspense books with The Wild Rose Press and seven short stories, published over the past 18 months. Very limited success, but I realize I’ve accomplished more than most who set out, stars in their eyes, to write a book. So I can’t complain.

I still agonize over rejections, but not as much as before. I’ve gotten a lot more relaxed. A rejection isn’t going to change my life. A three-book contract with an advance well into the six figures, on the other hand, can change my life quite a bit.

I write because I love to write. Simple as that. Do I want to sell more books? You bet. Will I? I have no idea, but I don’t believe in giving up. I’ll keep submitting to “Woman’s World” because I’d sure like to make $800 for an 800-word story. I’m revising my werewolf paranormal yet again because I love my hero Nick and my heroine Kyla (she’s gone through a few name changes). At times I’ve thought of putting my paranormal into the proverbial drawer and forgetting about it. But I believe in that book and love it, so I’ll keep submitting. Or I may self-publish with Amazon or Smashwords. I believe in it that much.

I write even though my husband is non-supportive and is resentful of the time I spend writing. I try to balance my writing with doing work around the house and spending time with hubby. It’s not always an easy balancing act. I will continue to write until I no longer get pleasure from it, until my heart no longer soars when I’m with Alec and Sabrina, Mary Beth and Tom, Logan and Doriana, Dominic and Lexie, Chloe and Matteo, Nick and Kyla. And I will continue to write my short stories for the confession magazines. They keep me in the game.

So why do you write?